It wasn’t especially intentional, just the way things unfolded, but I stopped practicing asana around Wilfred right around the time he became mobile. I think it was more due to COVID and the sudden online access I had to my teachers on the regular and my need to not have my baby smash my laptop/lifeline to the world beyond Overlook Hill. But, out of my brightly lit bedroom and down into the basement I went. Practicing during a nap or with the support of Chris or one of the kids.
It has been marvelous. It has been the biggest boon to my physical practice to have all of this Live content in easy reach. Makes longer and more detailed practices more accessible than they would ever be otherwise with 3 kids and 3 dogs and all of the stuff of a full and active life. Ah yes, those silver linings. I am taking advantage of mine and trying to remain cognizant of it being a gift and a luxury and not a right.
However, in the past couple of weeks, I have been practicing rolling out my mat with WIlfie so that he can begin to learn to be comfortable and fluid with that time. I have been using Darren’s current offering, Yoga Trove, as the framework for our time together. It is just the right length, perfectly casual, with a little bit of seated practice and an opportunity to gently interact with the laptop now that he is no longer so much the smash.
It is really important to me that Wilfred get a sense of mom on her mat as a natural part of the day. One in which I am present and available but also engaged otherwise. I am not a fan of being a jungle gym for my kids while on my mat- at other times, absolutely- but practice time is distinct and requires a different sort of engagement. I really like the concept of proximal play zones when it comes to home practice with small children. We are together but also doing our own things, neither disrupting nor ignoring the other. It takes practice to get to this point and that is what Wilfs and I are working on now. I am being less precious about my practice- which I believe is really key when it comes to home practice in general and practicing around family in particular. And Wilfred gets to become comfortable with the time as something that happens regularly and in which he gets to do his own thing and let mama do hers.
After several days throughout the last week of this sort of practice, yesterday was our very best day yet. He let me do my thing, toddling over now and then for a kiss - a poochie pose as Eider used to call it- and only asking to nurse briefly on two occasions. Previously it had been devolving into nursing about midway to 2/3 the way through which is fine and to be expected. We have been practicing this way in the hour before his nap, and it is also hard sometimes to not want to plop down to nurse and snuggle when your mom appears to be laying on the floor. But yesterday he just needed to check-in and then went back to his play. During the brief pranayama and seated practice, he spent about half of that time quietly sitting on my lap which is more than I could ever hope for and feels like a continued affirmation of my belief that our children entrain to our energy and we are wise to make our energy worthy of that.
This feels so good, even if they are not my best efforts on my mat they really are serving something so much bigger than that. In a very similar way, that is how I feel about the times during the week that Maple or Eider are responsible for watching their brother while I practice. Sure it is absolutely wonderful for me to get a nice long and uninterrupted stretch in, it is marvelous, as I said above. But if that were the only gain to be had I would be far less likely to put the effort into making it so than I am with the added benefit that it is for my kids to have to show up for me and for each other. It is a gift that they have to care for our littlest while I care for myself. For me, sure. For them, especially.
These are my thoughts on home practice with littles right now. Different, but not separate. Like so many things. For some more of my thoughts on the subject check out this much older post.
As ever, thank you for reading.
xxx,m